i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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