He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
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