this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
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