so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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