I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
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