if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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