NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
Every time I burp I plan an escape route because I'm scared I'm gonna puke on grandma
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
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