I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
The best revenge is premature balding
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
Randomize
