the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
Randomize
