shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
Randomize
