I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
I am not drunk. I will recite the pledge.
I don't want you to recite the pledge!
Pledge alligien to america to united states of america
What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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