what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
Randomize
