let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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