i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
Ketchup is God's man juice
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
