PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
Randomize
