He is an equal opportunity slut.
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
I'm watching my cat lick a used condom wrapper on my nightstand and I'm too hungover to move and do anything about it. Tequila Tuesdays can not be a thing.
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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