Texts From Last Night

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  (303): View more from Colorado

  do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???

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  (303): do u usually make out with people before telling them your name??? http://tfl.nu/ocp0
  Replies (27) Good night (4562) Bad night (1460)
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  (803): View more from South Carolina

  I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on

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  (803): I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on http://tfl.nu/5tgi
  Replies (43) Good night (9726) Bad night (1156)
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  (607): View more from New York

  please dont tell anyone i was drunk

  (1-607): View more from New York

  you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know

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  (607): please dont tell anyone i was drunk (1-607): you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know http://tfl.nu/3807
  Replies (12) Good night (1305) Bad night (4455)
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  (506): View more from New Brunswick

  No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.

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  (506): No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better. http://tfl.nu/gi84
  Replies (5) Good night (2673) Bad night (1022)
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  (636): View more from Missouri

  I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.

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  (636): I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk. http://tfl.nu/1zna
  Replies (4) Good night (1407) Bad night (2585)
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  (678): View more from Georgia

  Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops

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  (678): Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops http://tfl.nu/ljhs
  Replies (2) Good night (1979) Bad night (1107)
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.

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  (+44): It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done. http://tfl.nu/song
  Replies (12) Good night (4442) Bad night (972)
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  (785): View more from Kansas

  I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag

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  (785): I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag http://tfl.nu/283w
  Replies (7) Good night (2738) Bad night (857)
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  (972): View more from Texas

  Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.

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  (972): Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention. http://tfl.nu/nbnk
  Replies (21) Good night (842) Bad night (2751)
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  (512): View more from Texas

  I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?

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  (512): I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I? http://tfl.nu/ch97
  Replies (6) Good night (1677) Bad night (546)
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  (937): View more from Ohio

  I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.

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  (937): I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart. http://tfl.nu/okmj
  Replies (15) Good night (2237) Bad night (830)
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.

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  (503): Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go. http://tfl.nu/c4rz
  Replies (3) Good night (979) Bad night (506)
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.

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  (847): I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text. http://tfl.nu/zkwg
  Replies (6) Good night (669) Bad night (336)
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  (630): View more from Illinois

  I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.

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  (630): I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila. http://tfl.nu/fzc9
  Replies (3) Good night (419) Bad night (601)
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  (763): View more from Minnesota

  I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito

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  (763): I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito http://tfl.nu/mwpd
  Replies (0) Good night (428) Bad night (149)

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