I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
Randomize
