Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Randomize