this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
did you just send me my own nude
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
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