Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize
