I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
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