Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Randomize
