Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
he wants to bone in the snuggie
So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
How do I un-spend everything I bought last night? Seriously...was a penis shaped piñata and enough tequila to fill my bathtub really that necessary?
At least you can say you've literally dumped money down the drain
Randomize
