So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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