Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
Randomize
