i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
Drunk walkin through police station. America
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
