I puked a lego.
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
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