What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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