id be glad to
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
I think my greatest accomplishment today was probably using a bottle opener to get the cap off my fourth drink while holding the cat WITHOUT dropping him.
Oh god, what has my life become?
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
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