So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
Randomize
