dude i'm inner monologue high
No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
Randomize
