i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
foreskin is a definite game changer
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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