i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
Randomize