Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(702): View more from Nevada

**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha

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(702): **** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha http://tfl.nu/p7u5

Replies (4) Good night (774) Bad night (646)
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(416): View more from Ontario

She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.

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(416): She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up. http://tfl.nu/q0c1

Replies (7) Good night (578) Bad night (1758)
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(214): View more from Texas

You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song

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(214): You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song http://tfl.nu/2x4f

Replies (25) Good night (9755) Bad night (872)
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(678): View more from Georgia

while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.

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(678): while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF. http://tfl.nu/huje

Replies (130) Good night (15481) Bad night (1218)
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(315): View more from New York

can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet

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(315): can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet http://tfl.nu/ofc9

Replies (13) Good night (4843) Bad night (582)
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(206): View more from Washington

she told me i tasted like america

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(206): she told me i tasted like america http://tfl.nu/ed46

Replies (31) Good night (7830) Bad night (1157)
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(916): View more from California

It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.

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(916): It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable. http://tfl.nu/6byi

Replies (7) Good night (3321) Bad night (1403)
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(863): View more from Florida

There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.

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(863): There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent. http://tfl.nu/g0ez

Replies (21) Good night (7143) Bad night (1189)
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(651): View more from Minnesota

That bitch ruined vodka saturday

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(651): That bitch ruined vodka saturday http://tfl.nu/2db3

Replies (6) Good night (651) Bad night (1818)
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(217): View more from Illinois

I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories

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(217): I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories http://tfl.nu/vqmd

Replies (6) Good night (1698) Bad night (568)
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(253): View more from Washington

I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks

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(253): I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks http://tfl.nu/tvej

Replies (11) Good night (1055) Bad night (557)
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(317): View more from Indiana

When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.

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(317): When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work. http://tfl.nu/4lb8

Replies (13) Good night (2168) Bad night (585)
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(714): View more from California

I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.

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(714): I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle. http://tfl.nu/7gdx

Replies (10) Good night (413) Bad night (914)
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(612): View more from Minnesota

It's really funny to see the look on the sales lady's face when she asks why you're replacing a painting. "I knocked it off the wall during sex w/ my heels," wasn't what she expected.

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(612): It's really funny to see the look on the sales lady's face when she asks why you're replacing a painting. "I knocked it off the wall during sex w/ my heels," wasn't what she expected. http://tfl.nu/ebyi

Replies (4) Good night (810) Bad night (252)
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(315): View more from New York

not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.

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(315): not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears. http://tfl.nu/mw0m

Replies (10) Good night (954) Bad night (218)

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