If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
whose ass print is on the piano?
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize
