id be glad to
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
Thanks for telling my landlord that the poop stain was yours and not my secret dog.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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