I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
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