No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize
