I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
Randomize
