I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
no more duck duck goose at the bar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
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