vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
Pooping to opera.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
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