Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
Randomize
