it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
there's paper in my vomit.
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Randomize
