Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
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