Actions speak louder than pants.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
