Picture the opening band right now: euro, beer guts, one member in oversized hipster lumberjack apparel, the other in childsized american apparel and shorts. Singing in german.
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
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