I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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