i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
Randomize