They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
On today's episode of "What the Shit Did I Do Last Night," drunk me deleted ALL of the text messages I've ever had. Awesome.
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
Randomize